It has come to me that love ia a lifestyle, an option.
There is society's pressure creating models and obligations for the modern life and this leads us to wanting love without questioning why.
Come on people, there are several ways to meet people nowadays so when we have too many options, what's the point of choosing?
So with the contradiction of a world that sells the types of relationships we should keep and limitless ways of meeting people, somehow our endless path towards love is: meet someone, start a relationship, "Ops, Didn't work out! But the next one will be better!". This just breaks our heart and leaves scars. Then there's the risk of being defined by your scars.
After this bragging, my point is there is no fun.
We create the routine and its problems, we live our dramas, create ways so we'll do everything in a relationship but to unite and love each other.
That intense happiness, the love and caring feeling towards our loved one is gone... underestimated and hopeless.
This modern approach of life opposes to love, to romance.
Love is wanting to never be away from him.
Love is about doing everything just to make him smile.
Massage him and make him forget about the hardness of the day.
Love is him suprising you with a gift he sent from another country.
People sometimes act like this, mostly with good intentions, but not enough heart.
Maybe they haven't been hurt enough to realize what it comes with the commitment of loving someone.
Mostly they don't have the necessary amount of scars to overcome.
Maybe the point is that love shouldn't just happen. Love must be chosen.
It's about knowing what it is and what it isn't. It's about seeing the loved one with such a special soul that you would be able to see you two together as something fresh and new, that you would be willing to accept as yours.
Love is an option and I hope it is Adam's. Because it is mine.
Our relationship would mean long periods without seeing each other, big adaptation periods and decisions. But it also means a great story to live and to tell. A story drawn on our own terms. The relationship everyone should know is ours.
Then again, if you see that life for yourself, you can choose to get it. And when you make that decision, aware of what you both want to feel, you try your best to make the other happy, with the constant proof he feels the same way - there's no holding back.
There's only you two trying to be happy on your own way but deciding to share it with someone. We know we can do it alone, we know we can do it together. What comes next is totally up to us.
I can say for myself that I would gladly choose Adam to be my only one. He's everything I've asked a man to be. And that's a lot.
Now, how does he feel? Does it matter? I think it matters that he should know why you're doing what you're doing so he'll know, maybe understand. Maybe he's waiting to hear these words from me, who knows. All I can do is love him the best way I can, put the effort on what I want to last forever, what makes me happy.
It's about being like Peeta.
It's about choosing to devote to someone no matter what. That's what I'm looking for.
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